It really is amazing how you can look in the mirror everyday and not notice the subtle changes here and there, but all the sudden one day you reach for something and you're like, "Wait a minute, did I just feel my bone there?!" Or you glance sideways in the mirror and realize the person looking back at you is really you afterall and that the person you are looking at is different.
So many of those moments over the last few months, but especially the last few weeks have seemed even more surreal. As of today I am officially down 92lbs! It's been very gradual over the last couple of months, however, still consistent. I have also stepped up my workout schedule and am happy to say I enjoy working out more now.
The other day I was at work and one of my students I hadn't seen in over a year dropped by the office to visit with me. At first I glanced up and she was looking between my old work cubicle and back again to my new one (I had a promotion back in November, so I had moved across and up from where I was at before). Anyway, she looked confused as I glanced back to see what was going on. Then she realized it was indeed me and a look of absolute shock was on her face. She immediately exclaimed, "Wow, you look great!" I was laughing because the look on her face was priceless. She continued on to say it appeared I had lost a lot of weight. She had no way of knowing the means to how I did it, but to hear and see her reaction was heart warming. It's funny, because I've had a few reactions like this lately and it wakes me up a bit to realize that nearly a 100lbs loss is actually pretty astounding. I have been wanting to lose this weight for so long, I had forgotten all the little things along the way that I have found myself being able to do again.
I just enjoyed one this evening. I gave myself a manicure/pedicure which a year ago I could hardly trim my own toe nails or even paint them because I was so overweight. No one likes to admit these things, but my own husband watched me try and it broke his heart. At the time though, I was in the beginning stages of getting my paperwork ready for the surgery, so I knew I was doing something about it.
The other morning, I ran from my car all the way into my office, and guess what I was barely huffing. Before, to walk from my car just to the building I'd already feel winded at my heaviest. Moving around was not easy when I was that heavy.
So many things to think about as one makes this journey. It's impossible to know ahead of time, or understand as you are going through it just how much it all makes a difference.
I''m not done yet, not by a long shot - but I do feel SO much better. I've gotten my life back. I can do things again. I am not making anymore excuses to why I am not doing things. Heck, I even applied to the university I work at, so I could transfer my credits and finish my degree! I am so motivated and now realize there is no limit to what one can do once they put their mind to something.
I always knew this and had done things in my life up to this point to already prove that. However, I had lost sight of this determination the last few years. But I am happy to report, I have found it again!!!
Had my six month check-in at the Bariatric office the other day. Met with the nurse and dietician and they both were pleased with my progress. I am on track and all is good!
Life is good:)
